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Hey Reader!

So there I was, craving some quick, greasy, regret-laden fast food because, clearly, I make excellent life choices. I roll up to the drive-thru, place my order, and—miracle of miracles—everything seems to be running smoothly. Then, disaster strikes. The employee hands me my drinks and hits me with the dreaded, "Can you just pull forward and wait?"

Fantastic. Because nothing says "fast food" like parking in a numbered slot and contemplating my life choices while my ice melts into a disappointing, lukewarm soup. By the time my food finally arrived, I had downed half my tea in frustration, and the other drinks had become a sad, diluted ghost of their former selves.

I expected efficiency and a seamless transaction. But, as life so often does, reality smacked me in the face with a soggy, half-hearted burger. And of course...

It got me thinking…

High Standards, No Expectations

One of the biggest challenges in sports—and life—is managing expectations. We walk into situations assuming they’ll unfold in a certain way. Athletes expect to get playing time. Coaches expect their game plan to work flawlessly. Parents expect their child’s hard work to be rewarded. And when those expectations don’t match reality, frustration sets in.

But here’s the problem: expectations focus on outcomes, not effort. And when we fixate on results we can’t control, we set ourselves up for disappointment.

Instead of clinging to expectations, the key is to maintain high standards. Standards are about commitment, discipline, and effort—things within our control. When we focus on upholding high standards, we stay adaptable, resilient, and in the moment.

Take my fast-food experience. My expectation (hot food and fresh drinks, all at once) wasn’t met. That frustration almost ruined my meal. But had I focused on the standard—the fact that I still got a meal, even if delayed—I wouldn’t have let something small sour the experience.

It’s the same in sports. If an athlete expects to start every game and doesn’t, disappointment can cloud their ability to improve. But if they hold themselves to the standard of preparation, work ethic, and growth, they stay in control. The same applies to coaches, parents, and anyone striving for success—focus on effort and mindset, not rigid expectations.

Reframing the Mindset

• Instead of “I expect to be the top player,” shift to “I will hold myself to the highest standard of preparation and performance.”
• Instead of “I expect things to go my way,” shift to “I will be prepared and adaptable, no matter what happens.”
• Instead of “I expect to win,” shift to “I will give everything I have and trust the process.”

When we let go of expectations, we free ourselves from unnecessary frustration. Hold yourself to high standards, but detach from rigid outcomes. That’s how you stay focused, resilient, and in control—on and off the field.

At the end of the day, expectations can feel like that perfectly prepared meal you envision, but reality has a way of serving up something slightly different—maybe lukewarm, maybe not exactly what you wanted, but still something you can make the most of. Keep your standards high, but leave your expectations at the door. The real wins come from effort, not entitlement.

Speaking of expectations, sometimes the best lessons come when they aren’t met. And what’s the best way to deal with that? Losing. That’s right, good ol’ fashioned failure.

If that sounds depressing, stay with me. In this episode of The Mental Cast, I explore why losing isn’t the end of the world—but actually one of the best ways to grow. From handling setbacks to building resilience, this episode dives into why loss can be a powerful teacher.

You can listen to the full episode here: The Mental Cast - Season 4: Episode 7​

Until next time, remember…

#DontSuck and It is either one day or day one. The choice is yours.

~Dan

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For more resources such as blogs, vlogs, and upcoming webinars, visit DanMickle.com.

Also, visit MentalCast.com for the latest episode of The MentalCast podcast.

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